Siren of Water

Siren of Water
Dark Goddess

First Impressions:  This card is beautiful and reminds me of a Botticelli painting.  Aphrodite is gorgeous and the epitome of sex appeal, but she is always painted alone.  She is the Goddess of Love, but she is never a goddess that I would call upon for love as she strikes me as not about love as much as about worship. 

Book:  Engenders desire for love, connections and communion, Passion overcoming the haughty, opening the heart.

Guidance:  Love is a risk you must take, create or do something you love, admit your desire

Journaling:

This card is yet another reminder to open my heart to love.  One of the things I've been pondering lately is who I want to be with.  Is it someone I already know who knows and loves the "old" me?  Or is it someone new who will just be getting to know me?  There is a part of me that feels I have to move on and that I'm ready for the next phase of my life. 

Someone I care about did something that I feel disrespected me and I'm not sure how to react.    I know that I need respect in my life and if people can't respect me, then they don't need/deserve to be in my life.  For me this card is about loving and respecting myself.

December 18, 2017

It was pretty cool when I was putting up the tree and found my Bremen ornament and instead of immediately thinking about who I was with in Germany, I thought about my own memories of being in Bremen around the holidays.  This was huge progress for me.  I know there will always be a part of me that loves him, but I'm done waiting and I'm ready to move on with my life.

December 26, 2017

I've gotten a lot better about putting myself first and loving myself.  Maybe the message of Aphrodite is that all things are about love and pleasure and that loving ourselves can help create an atmosphere where there is more love and light in the world overall.

Witch of Water

Witch of Water
Dark Goddess Tarot

First Impressions:  Emotional Control

Book:  Power of the goddess is eating all sins, salt holds purification, and protection

Guidance:  Demonstrate your beliefs and ethics, look beyond form to essence, bathe in salt water

Journaling:

Interesting meaning of this card.  I like looking at it as purification and the need to cleanse ourselves.  I need to do some meditations on this card and also take a salt bath.

December 19, 2017

I'm realizing that purification is about more than clearing the energy around me.  It is also about clearing out the old behaviors and thought patterns that are keeping me stuck.  I need to let go of my poverty consciousness and choose to believe that it will all work out.

December 26, 2017

It is so awesome to read through old journals as I can see my growth.  I can see ideas that bubble up that are being implemented at deeper and deeper levels.  Redirecting my thoughts is something that still feels uncomfortable for me as it feels unnatural, but as I read through my old journals I can see that I am continuing to get better at it.

I know I'm making progress because when I got an invite to a reorganization meeting from Darshan, my immediate reaction was to freak out and assume I was being fired.  However, I talked myself off the ledge by reminding myself that they would not fire me on an open meeting.  If I was going to get fired, I would have already been told.  That was cold comfort, but it did bring me peace and I was able to actually sleep without totally freaking myself out with worry.  I also reminded myself that there was nothing I could do about it anyway.  If it happened, it happened and I'd deal with it.

How can I be more mindful?

Shaker Lake Nature Preserve, Shaker Heights, OH

As I was walking through the Shaker Lake Nature preserve I was struck by how easy it is to be mindful in the woods when there are fewer man-made distractions.  So I stopped and settled myself on a wooden bench and pulled a few cards.