Monday, March 14, 2022

Page of Swords

Deck:  Light Seer's Tarot

First Impressions:  Floating away, lost in a book, coming down to earth

Book:  Thirst for information, an apprentice, being tested or judged, a time to let go of worry

Guidance:   Keep the lightbulb of curiosity turned on


I love the reminder to continue being curious.  There are times when I get so stressed out and school seems like so much work, but then I remember that I am learning so much and becoming a more informed person.  For the most part, I love the research but I have been so stressed lately and work has been such a grind that I've felt like I don't have the time or energy for learning, but school is sacred and it is something that normally brings me joy.  I need to figure out how to let go of the things that don't bring me joy so that I have the time and energy for school.

Where I'm At: It's been a long day as I had a meeting until 7 and Cam did not get off until 10 which meant we ate super late.

Weather: It was about 50 out

Moon Phase:  Waxing Gibbous 91%

Sunrise / Sunset: 7:38 am / 7: 33 pm


March 3, 2022

Deck:  Light Seer's Tarot

First Impressions:  I love this card because for me it is saying that books can lift you up and take you out of your ordinary world.  They do that by feeding imagination and providing knowledge.

Book:  Restless energy, thirst for information, ideas and reasoning, old ideals destroyed

Guidance:   Exciting page of swords energy to help answer the question of where I'm going


This is another card about using logic to figure out where I'm going instead of relying on my heart.  My gut reaction is to always go to my heart to figure out what the next step is, but the cards lately have been telling me to trust my brain.  My brain says that the logical course of action for now is to stay where I'm at.  My salary helps me to pay the bills and gives me a great lifestyle.  I'm also actually making progress on getting my bills paid off.  However, my heart doesn't like that answer as I would rather ditch the job and move into something that feeds my soul.

My health is also a reason to stay at nestle as my drugs are flipping expensive and right now my insurance pays for them.

Where I'm At: It was a quiet evening at home.  Wendy wasn't feeling well so I stayed with her and worked to help her feel better.

Weather: Cold and crisp

Moon Phase:  Waxing Crescent 1%

Sunrise / Sunset: 6:58 am / 6:19 pm


 February 9, 2022

Deck:  Tarot of the Divine

First Impressions:  Climbing high, listening to guidance from the little birdie, tenacity, doing whatever it takes

Book:  Harbinger of new beginning and new ideas, optimism, energy, thoughtfulness, curiosity

Guidance:  Use wit to succeed where others have failed


I'm mostly in a good place today as I had good meetings and I got a lot done, but I'm also feeling stuck.  Other people get to move into other roles and I'm stuck.  I'm also not happy that Glenn says he's going to roll out the Digital Committee that I spearheaded.  It's that battle with my ego again.  At the end of the day, I get paid so it isn't a huge deal, but I hate the thought that other people think I suck because I'm stuck.

And there's the rub, it is all about my ego and what other people think of me.  I really shouldn't give a rat's ass what other people think and be satisfied with that I do for the sake of doing it.  To a certain extent I am satisfied because i get to use my curiosity to see what i can make happen, but at the same token, it isn't fair if other people take credit for my ideas.

The truth of the matter is I'm feeling stuck because I don't like working for someone else.  I want to have the creativity to do research and to feed my soul.  I think I need to start a novena and just keep putting it out there.

Where I'm At:  I'm at home this week and am in a fairly good space.  The house is still messy and needs work, but since Mercury Retrograde is gone, I'm feeling better.

Mood:  I'm in a good mood today.  I got stuff done at work

Weather:   it is cold and crisp outside with the temp being 44 degrees.  It looks like a lot of the snow has melted.

Moon Phase:  Waxing Gibbous, 59%

Sunrise / Sunset:  7:29 PM / 5:52 PM


August 12, 2019

Deck:  Tarot de St. Croix

First Impressions:  Learning, knowledge, intellectual

Book:  Harmonious symmetry

Guidance:  Open your mind to new ideas, messages come through learning that are a catalyst for change


Meeting Heather was such a godsend because it was so much easier to show up since I had already met someone.  I was also thrilled to see such an amazing group gather.  Today was truly a day about opening my mind to new ideas and realizing how intellectual learning stimulates my emotional learning.  I was also so pleased that there were people who were actually interested in my background and thought that I had something to contribute.

What is so amazing is that it truly does feel as if I'm found my niche where I belong and where I can actually add value to the world.  I think part of what I'm feeling right now is that I'm not learning, growing, and adding unique value to the world.  Being at this conference was truly all about learning and figuring out new pathways.  I don't know what those new pathways are yet, but I do know that I'm definitely changing.

I'm grateful for people being interested in my background
I'm grateful for being included in the Qualitative Research Group
I'm grateful for being in such a beautiful space
I'm grateful for all the great information
I'm grateful for the awesome hummus place that Clam and I went to for dinner
I'm grateful for getting a good night's sleep
I'm grateful for Jeanette

August 4, 2019

Deck:  World Spirit Tarot

First Impressions:  Arrogance, facing the future

Book:  Intelligent and insightful, discovering what is hidden, not afraid to speak the truth

Guidance:  Tailor your talent to the world of human reality

JournalingThe meaning on this card makes me smile as I sometimes race ahead of everyone else and am left looking back waiting for them to catch up.  This card serves as a reminder that I live in the human realm and I need to be kind and to help others along instead of racing ahead of everyone else because I can.  My job generally helps me with that as I get a reminder on every project what it is like to be back at the beginning and starting over. 

The page of swords also serves as a reminder that learning can be fun and that it can be amazing to jump into a pool of new knowledge and learn something new.  We often get so caught up in being the smartest person in the world that we forget what it is like to have beginner's mind and start from the beginning. 

I'm grateful for the yummy Spanglish and flirting with the guy behind the counter
I'm grateful for the safe drive to Chicago
I'm grateful that the Delta fixed my reservation for me
I'm grateful that it was a nice day for a drive
I'm grateful for driving down State Street with my top down

I'm grateful for seeing the beautiful moon


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