Sunday, February 4, 2018

Shadow Work--Day 5

What parts of my ancestral shadow are found in my own shadow

The first  card I pulled was the Sun and I'm not sure how to interpret this card for this position.  I think the best I could come up with is the hive mentality.  The fairy queen is pulling me in to follow the hive up the mountain and that truly fits my ancestral background as they had no tolerance for people who were different or who went their own way.  If you chose to be different, you were mocked or "put in your place."  This card should be about success and joy, but the way it is drawn the success and joy feels almost ominous.  I almost get a feeling of the borg out of this card as it is about assimilating people.

Dreamer eight is about being trapped in a web and it follows along with my interpretation of the sun
card.  This is about being pulled in and not knowing what is reality and not knowing what is smoke and mirrors.  This reflects both my family and my relationship with John as I was constantly told things that were not true.  I was told that I was unattractive, that women could not lead, that I was nothing.  It gets to the point that you don't know what is the truth anymore and it is all too easy to lose yourself in the lies and keep yourself trapped because you don't know what reality is.

The Wheel of Fortune is an interesting card as it is all about fate and about believing in fate and not free will. The one thing that strikes me about this card is that the fairy is offering food and it seems that is almost an attempt to draw me in and to pull me into the games.  This card is also about gambling and that is something that makes sense based on my mother's history with lottery tickets.

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